Sexual compatibility is a requirement for a healthy relationship. Both partners should be sexually satisfied and if not, communicate on what he/she needs to be satisfied. Unfortunately, that's not the case with this Strawberry Letter because this husband is out here PAYING for sex! Have you ever heard of such a thing?
Take a look:
Dear Shirley and Steve,
I am 45 and my husband is 46. We've been married for almost 18 years and have four children. Sex between us was really good and often. My husband wanted sex any time he saw me. I thought it was borderline neurotic, but my ego and my husband made me believe it was all about me. For a few years it was every day, but eventually I got bored with it and kids came along and life required that I do other things. This became a point of contention for us. I tried to accommodate him as best I could, but eventually he started cheating on me and for the most part I forgave him. We remained together and then had our twins, but from that point forward sex was something I did because I had to or when I felt the urge to but never when he wanted it and mostly with an attitude. Recently, I found out that he was having sexually explicit conversations with women on Facebook and exchanging naked pictures of himself, even some people who were friends with me. I never expected that part, but here we are. In the past few months he has been having a lot of difficulty paying his portion of the bills, but when I asked him about it he couldn't explain where his money was going. Then one weekend after he missed the payment for our kids karate and dance lessons, we had a big argument and he blurted out that he had been paying for sex. I was floored. He blamed me for not satisfying him like a wife is supposed to and stormed out of the house. Under normal circumstances this would be it, but here is where I am confused. In the past few years, I have become spiritual and a practicing Christian. I know I took vows to be with this man, but that was before God and church and Christianity was really a part of my life. I love church and I love God in a way that I never did before and I want to do what is expected of me, but I can't believe that God wants me to stay with this man who has done this to our relationship with my help I guess. Anyway, I know I have to forgive him, but I don't think I can ever sleep with this man again. Do I have to stay and try to work this out? I'm at my wit's end. He barely even acknowledged what he has done and still tries to sleep with me every night. I'm hurt and insulted, but I want to do what is right in a faithful way. Please help.
Can you believe this? I don't now who should get the major side-eye more? The husband who is out there paying for sex while his wife is at home taking care of their kids or the wife who knew about it the entire time and stayed? I understand she wants to honor her vows and stay with her husband, but she also must understand that she's not a doormat. This is not the first time that he's done this and by the looks of it, he's not stopping any time soon.
Alright, take a listen to what Shirley and Steve have to say about it:
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