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Why Ja, Why!?!

posted by Alonzo Patterson - 

Say it ain't so Ja... Nah, Ja!

It's a conspiracy, the man saw that we as a people look to Ja Rule for hope and brilliantly planned festivals for men, women, and millennials of all... kinds. 

They knew so they set out to destroy #FyreFestival. Their plan was simple:

  1. Align with Ja Rule.
  2. Almost plan a festival in the bahamas.
  3. Tell millennials that there will be people and music about people with tattoos with feelings.
  4. Say it's a lot of money, but not that much!
  5. And lastly, pictures of models... lots of pictures of models

The perfect plan. Because they know how much people trust Ja Rule, and why not? He gave us hits like.

Livin it up, Put it on Me, and I'm Real. He also inspired the JLO collaboration, which turns out to be one of the greatest wonders of the world (Somewhere around 8 or 9).

So keep your head up Ja because its obvious that that guy on twitter (William N. Finley IV ) with these photos was an informant placed by the man to keep us from looking to you for guidance in troubled times Ja. (Dave Chappelle Reference, ha. Don't get it? Click Here)

But really it's not your fault, right? Right Ja?

Okay, whew... That was a close one.

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