Dear Steve and Shirley,
My husband and I have been married for 21 years. When we first met, we were intimate a couple of times, but we decided not to have any more sex until we were married.
Neither one of us was in love when we said “I do” but I thought that we would grow to love one another.
On our wedding night, he refused to have sex with me. I should’ve ended the marriage then, but I didn’t. For the first few years of marriage, he worked in another state and he came home on the weekends. He refused to have sex with me when he came home. A few years later, we had children, but not the natural way. Sex was still not a part of my life. For the last two years, we have slept in different bedrooms and he is okay with that. We only have sex 3 or 4 times a year and I have to beg for it each time. I have tried to seduce him, but he does not like anything I try. He sees absolutely nothing wrong with our marriage. He told me love is overrated and sex is a luxury. We have never had an emotional connection but I have never had trouble with him cheating on me. I have tried everything and I’m ready to call it quits. Should I stay for the children or should I go while I still have time left? We’re in our forties. I failed to mention that he loves pornography.
Help! I really need your advice.