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The Strawberry Letter: Can My Sugar Baby Be My Lady?

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Subject: Can my sugar baby be my lady?

Dear Steve and Shirley, I’ve been in a relationship with a woman for a year and I need some advice. She’s 35 and I’m 54 years old. When we met, I was legally separated and I was miserable, in a one bedroom apartment and depressed because my wife had a new boyfriend already. I wanted an arrangement with a woman so I could get over my soon to be ex-wife. That’s when I met the lady that I called my sugar baby. She was honest about dating 2 other guys and said she’d love to spend time with me, but it would cost me. After a few months, it became our joke and she called herself my sugar baby every time I gave her money. She was a lot of fun and the sex made my toes curl. Within months, I was over my ex and I was crazy about my sugar baby. I asked her if we could be exclusive and she reminded me of our arrangement. I told her I was crazy about her and she said we needed to take a break. At this point, I had lost the power and she was in control. I cut her off and within months, she came running back to me, broke and hurt over a guy that she thought was in love with her. I was happy she was back, so I bought a house and she moved in. That was four months ago. She’s there 80% of the time because she still has an apartment. I want her to live with me 100% of the time but she is skeptical about letting her apartment go. She wants some kind of security blanket in case we break up. I know there are all kinds of red flags with dealing with my sugar baby, but I want to trust her and I want her to trust me. I’m ready to take her baggage and try to make this work. How do I show her that she’s secure with me? Or am I crazy for trying to make my sugar baby my main lady