Subject: I’m married to a messy mitch
Dear Steve and Shirley, I’m a wife, mother and businesswoman. I have known my husband for 13 years and we’ve been married for 10 years. In the beginning, he was the popular one and I was the wallflower. He would walk into a room and everyone was dying to talk to him. Now that the tables have turned, he’s become messy and he starts mess in our family and amongst his friends. I can’t say that he’s a gossiper because everything he says is true, but he just shouldn’t repeat what I tell him. Things took a shift in our relationship when he made some bad business decisions and a few of our friends were involved, which caused them to lose a lot of money. We lost money as well. At the time, I got a promotion at work and I was able to step in and get us back on track financially while he served his six months on house arrest. There were four couples involved in his downfall and only 2 of the guys involved have forgiven him and are working on rebuilding a friendship with him. I may be wrong for going behind his back and talking to them on his behalf, but I didn’t want to see him depressed, broke and friendless. I told my husband exactly how they felt and how they really didn’t want to be around him, but they’d give it a try. We had a small party for my 40th birthday and the friends group came. The couples talked to each other and kind of shunned my husband so he felt some-kind-of-way because it was at our house. He went off on them and said everything I had told him, word for word. He’s a messy mitch and he thinks it’s okay to talk crazy to these people. He also told my sister some things I said about her and now we’re not talking. If I can’t confide in my husband, is our marriage over?