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The Strawberry Letter: My Wife Used to Keep Herself Up

Dear Steve and Shirley,

I've been married for 13 years, and my wife and I work from home. I do food deliveries two nights a week just so I can get out of the house and give her some space. She goes walking with ladies in our neighborhood to give me space. I love that she's lost weight and kept it off, and so have I. We don't have sex as much as we used to, but when we do, we still have the best chemistry.

Everything would seem to be great with us, but it's not because my wife has let herself go in a lot of ways. I know you're going to say I'm being petty, and I might be the one with the problem, but check this out: whenever my wife and I are about to be intimate, I encourage her to take a nice bubble bath to get in the mood. I have to do that for more reasons than one.

When she's going walking with the other ladies, I suggested she wear a baseball cap instead of her hair scarf that she wears to bed every night. I ordered her exercise clothes so she will stop walking in my big t-shirt and her old jogging pants with all of them. I want her to present herself better than that when she's waving at our neighbors as she walks by.

I have asked her if she realizes her nails are grown out and need to be redone, and she's told me that they're fine since she doesn't have plans to go anywhere. Same with the toenails because she stopped trimming them herself. Maybe I'm being too hard on her, but I want her to be my cute, sexy wife at all times. And if I have to keep reminding her to do certain things to maintain herself, it's a problem. Why do I have to tell her to bathe? Am I wrong for how I feel? Please advise.