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The Strawberry Letter: I Never Knew That Men Fake It Too

Dear Steve and Shirley,

I'm 39 and divorced. My male cousin is 30, and he's been staying with me for the past month. I'm in a long-distance relationship and I'm usually with my man, so that means my cousin has my house to himself a lot. I trust him and I don't mind if he has company, but I was shocked to come home early and hear him and his female companion having sex.

I heard him as soon as I walked through the door, and his screams made me think he was being attacked, so I was scared to walk back to his bedroom. I called his phone, and he answered like he hadn't been doing anything. I apologized for interrupting him, and he said I didn't interrupt anything. A minute later, I heard the woman trying to tiptoe out of the house, so I stayed in my room.

Then my cousin came out and he was on the phone with one of his friends, saying how terrible the woman was in bed. He said she has ruined the fairy tale image he's always had of her. He said she couldn't hold a conversation, so all they could do was have sex, but it was trash too. He said he didn't want to do it with her twice, but he could not get her to leave. When he hung up, I told him that he sounded like he was enjoying himself when I walked in. He said he had to fake it because she wouldn't leave unless they had sex again. He said that men fake it too.

I was floored. He said when he's not feeling a woman, he'll fake it to get it over with. He said his stomach was hurting so bad one time that he faked it so he could hurry up and go to the bathroom. I would prefer to know that my sex isn't good instead of faking it. Why can't men be more honest? Please help.